I've recently read Parker Palmer's book, 'Let your life speak: listening for the voice of vocation' which was recommended to me. It has this great quote that I have been reflecting on the last month or so:
"The key to this form of community involves holding a paradox - the paradox of having relationships in which we protect each other's aloneness. We must come together in ways that respect the solitude of the soul, that avoid the unconscious violence we do when we try to save each other, that evoke our capacity to hold another life without dishonouring its mystery, never trying to coerce the other into meeting our own needs."
The quote comes out of the context of talking about the Quaker custom of a clearness committee - where you take a personal issue to a small group of people who are prohibited from suggesting "fixes" or giving you advice but who for three hours pose honest, open questions to help you discover your inner truth.
The idea with this practice is that the committees are a communal process that is supportive but not invasive. Palmer writes, "They help us probe questions and possibilities but forbid us from rendering judgment, allowing us to serve as midwives to a birth of consciousness that can only come from within."
It really strikes me that picture of deep truth being brought into being through community in a way that is non-violent in practice. What a huge challenge! What a amazing gift! I wonder how I can incorporate this in my life and the life of my community as I so often switch into the mode of "fixes" rather than being and questioning.
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